The Waiting (is the hardest part)

This weeks teaching comes from our team member, Sharon:

This week we have the opportunity to study Sarah.  Hers is the story of waiting, along with the temptations that arise during waiting.  I think we will see ourselves in this intriguing story that reads as interestingly as the greatest fiction.

The first mention of Sarah, or Sarai, is in Genesis 11:29 and 30 – “The name of Abram’s wife was Sarai………..Sarai was barren; she had no child.”  I don’t know about you, but those few simple words grab my heart.  “She had no child.”

We then go on to read in Genesis 12 that Abram’s father, Terah, took his grandson Lot, Abram and Sarai out of the land of Ur, the land of their kinsfolk, intending to settle in the land of Canaan. Ur was in what is now southeastern Iraq.  It would eventually be called Babylon, and is, ironically, the place of exile for the Israelites nearly a thousand years later.

Well, Terah died before they reached Canaan, in a region called Haran.  And it was at this point that the Lord himself spoke to Abram in Gen. 12:1-3, “Go forth from the land of your kinsfolk and from your father’s house to a land that I will show you.”  And then he stated his promise to Abram,

                      “I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you. I will make your name great, so that you will be a blessing.  I will bless those who bless you and curse those who curse you.  All the communities of the earth shall find blessing in you.”

 So they went as the Lord instructed them, Abram, Sarai, Lot and all their possessions, and set out for the land of Canaan, the land promised to Abram and his descendants.  And when they arrived there……… they found a severe famine.  And Abram made the decision to sojourn to Egypt in search of food.

 To complicate matters, Abram realized that because Sarai was so beautiful, the Egyptians might kill him if they found out he was her husband, so he asked her to lie and say that they were brother and sister (which was half true – same father different mothers). Pharaoh took Sarai into his palace, (which is interesting since she was already about 65 years old!).  But Gen. 12:16 says, “on her account it went very well with Abram, and he received flocks and herds, male and female slaves, male and female asses, and camels.”

But the Lord was not too happy; in fact, he intervened and struck Pharaoh’s household with severe plagues because of Abram’s wife.  When Pharaoh discovered the lie, he was only too happy to send Sarai and Abram packing, very rich now in livestock, silver and gold.

 Later in the story, after the establishment of the covenant between God and Abram, Abram asked Sarai to tell the same lie again as they sojourned through another region, with the same result!

Now let’s stop here for a moment and digest all that has transpired.  We know that wives obeyed their husbands in this culture and time period.  Indeed, a wife belonged to her husband, so of course, Sarai would go with Abram.  But it is interesting to imagine all that she might have been thinking!  We also know that Abram and his people were semi-nomadic, so to move from place to place was not uncommon.  However, the city of Ur was the place of their kinsfolk.  We know also that they were not “young.”  So they left behind them the only life they’d ever known to begin a new life; yet in this new place, Sarai’s humiliation remained, along with many other frustrations now. 

Perhaps she was wondering about her husband and about God,  “Why all the wandering, the lies, the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah from which we had to flee for our lives?”  Maybe Sarai missed the city of Ur.  When would they finally settle for a while?  When would the babies come?  After all, God said he’d make of Abram a great nation.  What was going on?

 As for Sarai’s continued barrenness, it is important to understand that it was a “double curse,” for the woman so afflicted lived with an unfulfilled longing on her part, but it also meant that her husband would have no heir, which was a very big deal.  Abram was a wealthy man now, and all that he owned would go to his steward if he had no heir.  So humiliation overshadowed both of them.

 Ten years after God first spoke His promise to Abram, Sarai must have decided she’d waited long enough!

Have you ever felt that way?!  When all the good things you’ve prayed for seem not to register with God?
That must be how Sarai felt.  So even if she could not bear a child, she would take matters into her own hands, and she would see to it that her husband had an heir.  She knew just what she would do.

Sarai had an Egyptian maidservant, Hagar, likely one of the slaves given to them by Pharaoh when they left Egypt.  Gen. 16:2 says, “Sarai said to Abram, ‘The Lord has kept me from bearing children (so she sees God as an adversary here;).  Have intercourse, then, with my maid; perhaps I shall have sons through her.’  Abram heeded Sarai’s request.”

 I think we find ourselves aghast when we read this, but ancient sources tell us that Sarai’s actions are in keeping with the laws of the time.  Clearly, though, this was not God’s will.  Even then, cultural mores weren’t the same as God’s!

 Let’s see what happens next.  Genesis 16:4-6:

“When (Hagar) became aware of her pregnancy, she looked on her mistress with disdain.  So Sarai said to Abram:  ‘You are responsible for this outrage against me.  I myself gave my maid to your embrace; but ever since she became aware of her pregnancy, she has been looking on me with disdain.  May the Lord decide between you and me!’  Abram told Sarai:  ‘Your maid is in your power.  Do to her whatever you please.’  Sarai then abused her so much that Hagar ran away from her.”

Ahhh……….there are always unintended consequences when we step out of God’s will, when we allow our trust in Him to recede, and take matters into our own hands.   And sin always begets more sin unless there is a conscious turning from it.  Sarai so longed for a child that she acted out of desperation, and in the aftermath she could not contain her jealousy and vengefulness.  Really, a spiritual catastrophe emerged that would hound her for another thirteen years until Isaac was born to her, and for three more after that, until she convinced Abraham to send Hagar and Ishmael into the desert.  The effects of her actions can still be seen in the Middle East today in the enmity between Arab peoples and the Israelites, for Ishmael was the child of slavery, but Isaac was the child of the Promise.

Every time I read this story, I am shocked at Sarai on the one hand, yet feel great sympathy for her on the other.  I realize that if my life were to be read like a book, it might inspire the very same reactions.  How have I let my trust in God struggle and even die?  I think of all the times I have reacted out of fear, pride, envy and just plain impatience…………..and then turned to the Lord to help me with damage control.

As some of you know, my husband is not Catholic.  He is a believer and a good man, and tries to live his life by Biblical principles.  But there have been times when I have simmered, fumed and been resentful over his lack of need to convert, which has probably given him more reason not to.  Truth be told, even if he were Catholic, I would have found something else to simmer and fume over.  But I want to emphasize God’s grace to me in helping me to shut my mouth and love my husband just as he is – because that’s what God does.  Love stands a far better chance of converting someone!  And now I am better able to wait for whatever God has in mind for our lives; but it has taken me a long time.

I have also found that when I ask the Lord for an increase in patience and trust, He does not disappoint me.  Sometimes, He places us in situations where we have no other option; but it drives home the message and increases our trust, as long as we are not kicking and screaming all the way!

  Apart from my marriage, the thing that has taught me most to wait on the Lord is the situation with my elderly parents.  I’m sure a number of you can relate.

Of course, I know how the situation will ultimately end.  They will pass away at the appointed time; and until then, things will continue as they have for the past several years.  My mom will gradually succumb to Alzheimer’s, and my dad will continue to go from one crisis to the next, his mental/emotional state always precarious.  All I can do is day by day love them, help them, watch them decline – the good days as well as the bad, when my dad says hurtful things, and when he actually thanks me.  It doesn’t matter.  I could be angry, resentful, impatient ………….. and I have been.  And it only make matters worse.  These kinds of situations are forced on us; we do not choose them, as Sarah did.  But in every situation we have the choice to trust and love, or to doubt and impose our own will.

 As I have thought about my own life and studied Sarah - she would become Sarah and Abram would become Abraham after God instituted circumcision as the sign of his covenant with Abram in Gen. 17, not long before Sarah conceived Isaac – I have also pondered how our Mother Mary waited on the Lord.  Mary declared herself to be “the handmaid of the Lord.”  That’s what a handmaid does – she waits.   When Gabriel announced God’s plan to her in Luke 1, she replies simply, “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord.  May it be done to me according to your word.”  She didn’t doubt and say, “Could you tell my parents and the rest of the town so they won’t stone me?” or “What the heck is Joseph going to say?” No, she kept her eyes fixed on the Lord, completely trusting all circumstances and consequences to Him.  Instead of acting out of fear and rushing to judgment, or speaking her mind, she pondered and trusted.  She knew her limits as a created being, in other words humility, and understood God’s sovereignty.  She is the embodiment of Romans 8:28, “We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.”

The words  “wait” and “hope” have similar meanings:
Wait – to remain or stay in expectation of
Hope – to look forward to with confidence of fulfillment

 So remember that when you are waiting for some good that you have asked of the Lord, or for help to endure humiliation and suffering, there is hope in the waiting; and He uses that waiting to grow you in virtue.  Do we desire to grow in virtue?

 It is hard to admit and accept the sufferings we bring upon ourselves, just as it was for Sarah.  I Peter 3:17 even says, “For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that be the will of God, than for doing evil.”  When we suffer for doing evil, we know it is deserved, but it still can be redemptive. When we suffer for doing good, it can be fully redemptive.  But beyond that, we have the power to harm and the power to bless in every situation, in every suffering/waiting.  And the Catechism 164 affirms what we know is true:

“The world we live in often seems very far from the one promised us by faith.  Our experiences of evil and suffering, injustice, and death, seem to contradict the Good News; they can shake our faith and become a temptation.”

   As Sarah probably thought, life just isn’t fair, is it?  But what can help us to bless and trust?

 I believe humility, obedience and gratitude are key.  Examining our consciences and practicing Reconciliation, both in and out of the Confessional are critical.  Focusing on our blessings helps make us content with our lot in life.

                Psalm 27:14 – Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord

                Psalm 130:5 – I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope.

                Isaiah 30:18 – Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you.  He rises to show you compassion.  For the Lord is a God of justice.  Blessed are all who wait for Him.

               Micah 7:7 But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.

When you read and hear these words, don’t they inspire confidence? When we fan the flames of pride, vengeance, self-pity, jealousy……….we may be devoured.  But when we let His word dwell richly in our hearts, as is our WOW mission, we are transformed.  His word, as Hebrew 4:12 tells us, is living, so its power moves our hearts toward the One who loves us more than any other.

Indeed, I believe that when Sarah saw the aftermath of her intervention, she knew that she had to wait.  It wasn’t easy, and Gen. 18:12 tells us that Sarah laughed to herself, in a doubting way, when she overheard the Lord promising Abraham that a year later they would have a son.

 Nonetheless, not holding anything against her, God blessed Sarah and Abraham with the son for whom they had so longed.  She was 90 and Abraham was 100!  What joy Isaac must have been in their old age.  And since Isaac means “laughed,” he would be the reminder of God’s faithfulness to her in spite of her sin.

       Do we laugh, too, at God’s promises?  Are they just too elusive to trust?  And yet His word tells us in II Cor. 1:20, “For however many are the promises of God, their YES is in (Christ).”  In other words, because Christ’s life, suffering, death and resurrection have reconciled us to God and opened up for us eternal life with Him, we can trust every circumstance to Him.  Remember, His word also says to us in I Cor. 13:12, “At present we see indistinctly…………..at present (we) know partially.”

               But God sees and knows fully; and He is faithful.

 

 

 

 

 

Eve Teaches Us Not to Hide

We start our study in the book of Genesis and the Creation story. The book of Genesis was written to reveal to us spiritual truths, not scientific facts.  It teaches us about creation of the world and creation of us.  We can learn, for instance, that God is the author of all life, that He created man and woman in his image, to be like him. etc.  There is so much to learn from these first 3 chapters of Genesis. Even though the purpose of the book is to teach us spiritual truths, the Church teaches us that there is still historical truth in it.  Adam and Eve were real people.  The Fall was an actual event.  The emotions were real that Adam and Eve experienced.  This week we focus on Eve and what she teaches us about ourselves as women. She has a lot to teach us!

If you have your Bible handy, you may read Genesis 2:18-25.  The scripture says “The man and his wife were both naked, yet they felt no shame”.  Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden, also known as Paradise.  Before the Fall, in the Garden, Eve was in perfect relation to God and to her husband.  She was perfectly in line with the Father’s Will.  She experienced perfect trust in her Father. No doubt, no shame, no distance from God.  SHE HAD DEEP INTIMACY WITH GOD.  The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) tells us that “Adam and Eve were in an original state of holiness and justice”.  She didn’t have to TRY to be holy, to struggle toward holiness – it was a part of who she was.  The Church also teaches us that because of this intimacy, man would not have to suffer or die.  Eve experienced an inner harmony in her heart, with God and with Adam.  In other words, we can say that Eve was living her dignity as a daughter of God perfectly! She KNEW and LIVED the fact that God created her “good” at all times of each day. 

In Genesis 3:1-8, we see the classic scene of the serpent tempting Eve to eat of the Tree of Knowledge.  Earlier, God had put a limit on Adam and Eve not to eat of the Tree of Knowledge.  The Church tells us that this one limit is symbolic of the fact that we are CREATURES, and NOT THE CREATOR.  In being created, we are limited.  We are not God, who is limitless; He has no beginning, no end.  We are dependent on our Creator and subject to the laws of creation and to the moral laws.   The CCC says that man “must freely recognize and respect with trust” these limits.  We must TRUST God and his plan for us!

In this first sin, “man…let his trust in his Creator die in his heart and disobeyed God’s commands…All subsequent sin would be disobedience toward God and lack of trust in his goodness.” (CCC 396) and further, in that first sin, “man preferred himself to God” (CCC 397).  So Eve loses trust in her Creator.  She asks herself (with help from Satan), “Is God holding back? Does He really have the power to make me free?  Is He even worthy of my trust?"  She prefers her own will to the will of God; not trusting that HE knows what’s good and evil in her life.  She now wants the power to make that decision for herself about what is good and evil.  That line from the catechism, that Eve let trust "in her Creator die in her heart" really hits me hard. 

Next, Adam and Eve realize they’re naked and they hide.  They are afraid of God.  Eve is now experiencing shame for her sin and is hiding from God.  She no longer sees her Creator as good.  That harmony and intimacy is now lost.

This is all such a typical pattern of sin in our own lives!  We are tempted, we give into sin, then we are shameful of ourselves and hide from the Lord.  We retreat farther and farther away from Him. 
 Think about what it’s like to be naked.  When we are naked, we are vulnerable.  When we become emotionally “naked”, we see who we truly are and many of us women don’t like what we see. 
We “hide” in shame from God, not turning to Him in prayer, avoiding Him at Mass (even if we are there physically), we create a façade of lies to convince ourselves that we’re OK without Him, etc.  We put on different masks to hide the parts of ourselves that we’re ashamed of or that we don’t like.  We create so many masks that we no longer recognize our own “goodness” as his created daughters. 

I (Alycia) often hide from God when I am ashamed of my sins and who I am, or even when I feel overwhelmed by my daily responsibilities.My family’s finances are often tight and I can get very overwhelmed by a feeling that we will never “get ahead”.  We will always have a stack of bills and sometimes not even all the money to pay those bills.Instead of going to the Lord, I hide from Him.  I don’t want to face the truth of my sufferings.  The truth is that I could do better to not spend frivolously, but I ignore that, and I ignore God.  Well then I feel that I am a horrible wife because I don’t pay more attention to our finances.  Then I surround myself with lies, that I’m a horrible wife because this and that, etc.  I fall deeper into shame, which all started from a lack of trust in His goodness.  And I will hear God calling my heart to prayer in my daily life, but I actively choose to ignore him, falling deeper in to despair and sin.  I will “hide” behind food, behind the internet, behind being mopy and self-centered around the house, being passive aggressive with my husband, etc. I am afraid of God and his judgments, so I avoid confession when I am in this cycle of sin and shame.

But there is hope sisters, for me, and if you can relate to my story, there is hope for you, too!

In Romans 5:20-21, Paul is speaking about the first "transgression" of Adam.  He says, "...where sin increased, grace overflowed all the more...".  God promised a savior to free us from the slavery of sin during the judgment of Eve.  That freedom is found in Jesus.  Jesus Christ gave himself as a gift to us on the Cross.  And, like the image of Divine Mercy, in dying on the Cross, he opened up a life of grace and mercy to us.  Where sin increases, grace overflows all the more!

In my prayer time once, I was crying out to God, and instead of hiding from him, I was coming to him with my shame and utter disgust in myself that I am such a wretched sinner.  I just remember being so disgusted with myself.  I also remember, then, hearing a very clear voice in my heart say, “Your sin does not cause me to retreat away from you. It causes me to draw nearer to you.” 

When you feel overwhelmed by your owns sins, by how you don’t live up to certain standards, when you don’t like who you are when you are “naked”, etc, grace is overflowing for us at that time.  God is near at that time, to clothe us with His salvation.  You MUST remember when we experience the harshness of sin and judgment, GOD IS ALWAYS THERE TO CLOTHE US WITH HIS SALVATION.  There is ALWAYS mercy in his judgments.  That is how God works.

October 1st is the Feast of St. Therese.  St. Therese teachings us a lot about God’s mercy.   In a pamphlet on St. Therese's teachings, Fr. Peter Cameron says, “Only the love that is mercy is capable of restoring men and women to themselves.  That is why God reveals himself to us as mercy and nothing less.  For mercy is the content of our intimacy with God.  Mercy is what our friendship with the Lord is all about."  And then the lovely Therese says something that I think really sums up what we can learn from this story of Eve: “I expect each day to discover new imperfections in myself…I am simply resigned to see myself always imperfect…My own folly is this: to trust that your love will accept me.”

Therese is teaching us that we need to resign ourselves to the fact that we will always stumble in our journey and we will always have imperfections.  We need to accept this and move on, basically.  When we are inclined to shame and disgust in ourselves, St. Therese encourages us instead to say to God, “I am so weak and powerless over sin in my life.  And for this reason, I give myself to you.  I come to you, trusting that you love me, and that I CAN love you in return.  Loving you doesn’t consist in being the perfect daughter, but in being the trusting daughter.”

Sisters, God is inviting us to trust Him. He doesn’t want us to run and hide in shame, but he invites us to hide in him, underneath the Cross, where his grace and mercy overflow unto us.   He wants us to shed the masks that cover up our true selves, to turn to Him and to let Him shelter us in His love.

His grace and mercy are available in the sacraments!  The sacraments get their “power” from the work of the Cross.  So every time we actively participate and open ourselves up to the sacraments, we are doing just that: hiding under the shadow of the Cross.

Let’s learn from Eve. Don’t let trust in God’s goodness die in your heart.  Don’t forget that you were made “good” and that you are His beloved daughter.  Don’t let shame keep you from His grace and mercy.  He accepts you, right where you’re at, and he has made a way for you to be intimate with Him, through Christ our Lord.

For the study questions, go

Welcome!

Welcome to our new blog!  We are very excited for our Fall 2013 Session.  There are some changes to the WOW program this fall, but be assured it is the work of the Lord.  You can look forward to diving into Scripture and studying what the Women of the Old Testament have to teach us about ourselves and our relationship with God.  The tabs right above here will help you get any information you need about our program and our Fall Schedule.  And please join us October 1st for our first session.  It's going to be a blessing to see you and grow with you in our faith.  May God bless you abundantly!